The Art of being Patient

I've realized that we Americans are accustomed to instant gratification. When we want something, we want it now. I've only spent 4 and 1/2 weeks in France, but I've already learned that living here is going to teach me patience.

My number one example is our landline phone/internet/cable TV service. We still haven't gotten it. As I mentioned in a previous post, when we moved to Pennsylvania, we had all of those services set up and ready to go in less than 48 hours after moving into our house. Our order here in France was put in almost 6 weeks ago, and we still have no service.

Example number two: our garbage service. We moved into our house here on a Friday, and on the following Monday morning I put in an order for a garbage bin. (You have to have an approved bin to get your garbage picked up by the city of Lyon.) I had to pay for the bin, including insurance in case it gets broken or stolen, but that was okay. What was worrisome was when the woman told me it would probably take about 15 days to get the bin.

Needless to say, by the time 15+ days have gone by, a family can accumulate a lot of garbage. I started putting it outside the kitchen door, but every night some animal would get into it, and every morning I had to clean up the mess. I emailed the garbage bin woman twice during the two weeks to ask if there was any progress with the bin. She said no, I just needed to wait longer.

Finally, right at the end of the 15-day period, the bin was delivered to the house. I was so excited! It's amazing that an event like that could make me so happy, but after all those days of picking up garbage outside, the bin looked really good to me. I emailed the woman who had helped me place the order to tell her I'd gotten the bin. Her reply was classic. Translated, it was something like this: "See, with a little patience, everything does happen."

There are other things, too. For example, if you go out to eat at a restaurant or cafe, there is no rush. You can sit and talk in a leisurely fashion with absolutely no one pressuring you to leave. This is a pleasant contrast from some places in the States, where you feel like the server wants to rush you out the door, especially during busy times. When I go out to eat here, I appreciate that I'm not rushed. However, when you want to get the check, you need to prepare yourself to be there for the long haul. The servers are in no hurry to bring you your check.

Another example is in check-out lines at stores. Jennifer, in particular, likes to do everything quickly and efficiently, and she expects others to do things quickly, too. Every time we wait in a line at a store, it drives her crazy that the people ahead in the line empty their cart slowly and deliberately, and then take several minutes to dig out their card or cash to pay the bill. (This has happened to us at toll plazas as well. We always get our money ready ahead of time. The people we are inevitably stuck behind, however, apparently have to dig through every possession in their car to find some money to pay the toll.) The etiquette here is that you wait patiently for the person ahead of you to finish their transaction. Muttering in a stage whisper about how long things are taking or honking your horn at someone at a toll plaza are not done, at least as far as I can tell.

More about patience. Most stores and businesses are closed all day Sunday and for two hours around lunchtime on Monday through Friday. Most businesses, including gas stations, aren't open much past 7:30 pm, either. This means that now that we're living here, we have to plan our shopping and our business dealings accordingly. In the States, if you want to go to a store, chances are you can get in your car, drive off, and find the store open. Perhaps that's because it's all about making the sale in the States. In France they don't seem to mind that there are several hours a week and all day Sunday when they could be selling things to customers but aren't.